How to Train Your Human

Today Mr Bentley and Royce came over to visit. We sniffed bums, then slept on pillow forts.   Of many pillows, I need the one my brother is sleeping on We begged for table scraps.  Why don't dogs get lunch? Resistance is futile We helped with homework.  You're welcome. I award you a degree in snuggling! #PlayDate #Snuggle #ResistanceIsFutile #PillowFort

Sometimes I'm really busy napping. This may be why it's taken several weeks to check out the slowly leaking kitchen sink... oops. Olympic sleep gold medalist I moved all the wet under the sink items, cleaned up the water, and got ready to investigate. I may have licked up some of the water before my human could stop me. Delicious. Delicacy: stagnant water I held the mag light, and we turned on the water. No leaks on either side. Then we turned on the sprayer and two droplets sneaked down the braided hose. My human unscrewed the nozzle, checked the gasket, then tightened the nozzle back down. She turned on the sprayer and turned the nozzle every which way, trying to get it to leak again. No more drops appeared. Mystery solved? We shall see my friends, we shall see. I fix things with my big cute eyes Until next time. Zzzzzz. #ChickenLittle #TheSkyIsFalling #Procrastination #OlympicNap

Hey folks there's a drought.  As little rain as San Diego receives, you can easily reuse it with rain barrels!  You'll even get a rebate  when you buy them. Where are my doggie safety goggles? We installed our first rain barrel months ago and checked it recently...it's full!  We used some of the collected rain to water the plants. Olly olly oxen free! I helped my human install another rain barrel. The only bad part was drilling into the metal rain gutter because of my bionic dog ears.  My classy human tried to use a table she found in the alley but it wasn't tall enough.  Cinder blocks did the trick.  Is there anything they can't do? #DogGoggles #OllyOllyOxenFree #OllieOllieOxenFree #RainBarrel #SaveWater

The kennels are painted! The kennels are painted! Although functional and certainly comfortable, the boarding suites were looking a little outdated. Sorry. Luxury boarding is a thing these days. My fellow canines and I were pretty smart when we became human's best friend. We need some humans Can you tell who inspired the dog in the tree? Our artist was very careful to make sure he didn't expose any pets to fumes. Thank you  Will! Cartoon me #LuxuryBoarding #InkPaint #WilliamSalas #PetMural #DoggieDaycare #CagelessBoarding #YoungGuns

Road trips are way better than being crammed under a plane seat.  My food and bowls and crate and leash and carrier were packed.  I was seat belted in beside my Grandpa, and we were off to Lake Havasu. Can't sleep, fear of missing something There was a car with three (full size, not pygmy) goats sunning themselves on the roof and hood! We stopped in Glamis and wished for ATVs. Giant litter box The inn was surrounded by places to sniff.  I was welcomed by their sign. Will there be pet massages? The next morning my humans crated me and went to breakfast.  I surprised them when they returned! Let me demonstrate We saw the London Bridge  and I was welcomed into the Visitor's Center.  They had a doggie water bowl inside. I do my own stunts We took a ferry to the casino and back and visited the fenced in dog park.  My Gpa got me a holiday outfit!  I needed another snooze after our adventures. Jumping the holiday shark #LakeHavasu

The end piece of our cinder block wall had been missing for... ahem... since we moved in. Spiders made their home in the hollow section (they tasted like chicken). One day we noticed puzzle pieces in the dirt below.  Woo hoo! Can I eat that? My human finally brought home some concrete patch so that I could repair the block. We glued the pieces back together and waited for them to dry.  I took lots of naps in the meantime.  Then we reattached the piece to the wall.  Goodbye arachnids, hello nicer looking fence! Umm... we could be napping #DoItHerself #FixItHerself #Arachnophobia #PuzzlePieces #AceHardware

My humans joke about me being a cat-like dog. I bathe myself frequently.  I nap a lot but wouldn't you? Instead of a mint I'm very flexible and could easily teach Doga. Upward facing dog #Doga #Yoga #CatDog #Carapo #PotHound

What if I merged with these cords?  Could I order food, toys, and mind blog? Introducing the reign of the Dogborg.  Luckily for the world I spend most of my hours napping. Take me to your zzzz #Dogborg #Futurama #TakeMeToYourLeader

My humans have trouble getting up in the morning.  I thwart them by snuggling, keeping them warm, and my cute powers. And sleeping (maniacal laughter) and sleeping... I wish their cupboards automatically filled themselves like my food bin. Dial-a-breakfast I think we should put wheels and autopilot on the bed.  I'm also in favor of Pee Wee Herman's Breakfast Machine and the Jetsons conveyor belt through the automatic shower to their vehicles. #BreakfastMachine #Jetsons #CarBed #Snuggling #CutePowers #SpaceleysSprockets #LosSupersonicos

The Miramar Landfill  has free or inexpensive mulch, compost, and wood chips.  Our landscaping needed some love, so my humans put my seat belt on and I got excited to ride in the car. Get outta my dreams We drove on windy landfill roads past trucks and heavy machinery I'd like to ride on to a dirt road. We arrived at the piles of free mulch and I needed a pit stop.  I waited impatiently and got tangled in my leash while my humans filled the tarp lined trunk, a garbage can, and bags in the backseat.  Up to two cubic yards were free for city residents if you loaded it up yourself! Get into my car At home we had already picked up my poop, pulled weeds, and put weed blockers down (a great way to recycle boxes).  I ran around supervising while my yard was filled with mulch! They even filled a hole we dug so we could dig there again. The new smells were exhilarating.   #MiramarLandfill #SanDiego #FreeMulch #BillyOcean