How to Train Your Human

When I first adopted my human, she had the misguided idea that dogs didn't belong on furniture (in part because her dogs were big).  I pretended to accept this at first, but slowly started re-training her. Pay no attention to that dog behind the curtain Over the years I'd sneak onto the bed.  I'm little so I'd convince people pet sitting me that I was allowed.  My human would see pictures and label them 'evidence' if she could tell I was on the furniture. Nothing to see here... With perseverance and patience on my part, I convinced her that snuggling with me all night was worth my occasional overzealous Breakfast Dance on her head. What is this 'work' that you speak of? Now she places me on the couch or bed and we spoon! Quietly here I'll sleep I won't even make a peep #SpoonYourDog #CouchSurfin #ReverendHortonHeat #WizardOfOz #DogOfOz

I'm an older lady and therefore rather lumpy.  So far they've all been benign (phew!).  Recently a mass appeared and was growing rapidly so my human decided it needed to come off before it got too big. I have a question... They ran my blood work (I'm going to live forever) and checked my heart, and then I was cleared for take off.  I had an IV catheter in my arm and fluids to keep my organs happy and to help my body eliminate the drugs faster.  Then I floated off to dreamland.   Intoxicated blogging When I woke up my teeth were clean and I had sutures in my skin.  Any time I could, I would sneak and lick my stitches. My surgery site got red and irritated, so then I had to wear a bandage.  I really wanted to pull the bandage off, but enjoyed the attention and sympathy.  I'm even cuter with a bandage on. Bandages are delicious The results came back, and it was a benign cyst! Hooray! #PetsNeedDentalCareToo  #AAHA #AllF...

When I first met my human I limed on her front porch and did as I pleased.  I came over daily for my eye medication.  Then one day I was snatched up to live in the house.  This was ok but I still had to make my rounds. So comfy I jumped the fence.  I wriggled through the drain (which was narrower than my skull...I have skills). I left through the kitchen window and returned before she did.  I climbed chain link into a guard dog's yard and made friends (the long suffering neighbors gave me back...along with a tortoise). I ran away on moving day. My throne I escaped on a plane and ran down the aisle (chihuahuas on a plane!).  I explored the neighbor's yard then went back to mine, but they told.  I went to a third neighbor's yard and pooped. Where could I be? All my misadventures have turned my moms into pros.  I haven't escaped in years...but I'm always watching for an opportunity. #EscapeArtist #CheckTheNeighbor'sYard #Mi...

The House Rabbit Society had their annual festival/ fundraiser in Balboa Park today. Hop on in... Veterinarians and other bunny experts spoke, and many generous vendors donated items for a silent auction.  Rabbits were groomed, rode around in strollers, frolicked in the park, and relaxed in the shade.  There were eating contests and bunny races!  Jasper (the middle guy) won his heat. Go bunnies! I had to live vicariously through delicious lagomorph smells, although I do have nice ears too.  My human went to Bunnyfest, and all I got was this lousy [cute!] sticker. my bunny is smarter than your honor student #Bunnyfest #HouseRabbitSociety #FlatBonnie

Oreo Bob Grey Dog Bacchus, international dog of mystery, could be my little brother or my son. I had a LOT of puppies during my life on the streets. Here's looking at you, kid Bacchus lived at the University of the West Indies and happily roamed the grounds.  He had lunch with students, siestas on the benches, and accompanied joggers and walkers while they exercised. Mr. Bacchus had a regular fanclub and several different names until the dog catcher came.  To save his life, a veterinary student caught him, neutered him, and he came to live in my flat. Sunshine photo bomb Bacc enjoys sleeping in beds too small for him, protecting our humans from motorcycles, speed eating, and sunshine.   Bacchuslocks He's usually a visitor's favorite as he loves being petted and belly rubs. My belly is irresistible to humans He's awesome. Raspberry #InternationalDogOfMystery #Bacchus #Pothound #TrinidadAndTobago #UniversityOfTheWestIndies #SchoolOfV...

One of my favorite pastimes is napping.  I nap in the car, in the yard, on the patio, in the sunshine, on my throne, on a dog bed, on the humans' bed (which is really mine too... aren't humans funny?), on my humans, under the bed, on the floor, on the couch, on the pillows on the couch...  Sweet dreams till sunbeams find you My human says I'm very worried and this is what I'm really doing when I appear to be sawing logs. There's no need for them to worry because I'm doing all the worrying for them. I was so worried about the environment that I had to take a snooze. Sweet dreams that leave all worries behind you I was so worried about politics that I dreamt I was eating comfort food [I need another nap because my video doesn't show up on all mobile devices/ web browsers]. I was so worried about the economy that a pillow fell on me and I continued napping. But in your dreams whatever they be dream a little dream of me Enj...

In the early morning, I start the breakfast wiggle. Breakfast can be delayed by rubbing my belly.  I can barely wait until the alarm goes off!  I jump around like a maniac, then remember my manners and sit for the door to open. secret image if you cross your eyes? I enthusiastically scarf down my meal without tasting it (nom nom nom) and lick the bowls. I sniff around the yard (sneaky little squirrels and birds!), belch, and then go back to bed.   my food magically appears, does yours? How long til dinner? #BreakfastDance #RubMyBelly #Nomnomnom #LickTheBowl

I have a lot of energy and arthritis.  So that I don't take over the world, and so that I live forever, on my human's day off I go swimming. This is not my favorite thing to do, but my friend Penny jumps in and swims off leash!  Crazy youngin!   Um, water is touching me The best part is when I'm dried off and sitting in the sun.   Ahhhhhh .... This is the life Then I nap in my backseat car hammock while wearing my seatbelt.  I'm not spoiled. Are we there yet? Afterward, I'm a sleepy little angel. Pillow fort! #WaterBurns #Merdog #DogHammock #PillowFort #SleepyLittleAngel

I did some modeling a couple weeks ago...or contributing to medical science.  You're welcome. I was given a funny haircut. I laid on a pillow while the humans gelled my belly and gave me a massage.  It was quiet and dark.  I snoozed at first, and then I riggled because I was bored. The good news is that I have the organs of a young pup!

From time to time, my humans rely on me to maintain our home.  I can be counted on to discover ideal napping spots, and to promptly clean up crumbs.  These are valuable contributions to my household.  This week I strapped on my toolbelt to help my human change some light bulbs. Once we got the dome off the light fixture without dropping or breaking it, we realized that these were no ordinary light bulbs.  We either needed an adapter for the screw in bulbs we had around the house, or special bulbs with prong attachments.  When home improvement for busy people needs supplies, we order things online and they appear within forty-eight hours, even on Sundays.  How is this possible?  Luckily for my humans, I'm always prepared.